“Sugar Daddy”

     Being a sugar daddy sucks.
     So much shame & guilt results.

I am codependent through & through.
     I feel guilt about how “abruptly” that I door-slammed her.
          She was using me.
               I meant nothing to her.
                    My
                         feelings
                    hurt
                         even
                    though
                         I never loved her.
               I was doing my best.
               Somehow, that never feels good enough.

Thousands more dollars & hundreds more hours spent trying to “help” someone once again.

Someone who outwardly “cried” for help…
     …yet inwardly clung to their traumas & familiar patterns of abuse…
picking their own sores open once again to let them fester.

     Aren’t I doing the same thing?